I have a question

This is about people who give and give and the people who go ahead and accept everything the person has to give.

Let us get this established: the giver is making a choice. Yes, many people do it compulsively. They don't know what else to do, and it's really hard for me to say that they've chosen to give, but yes, indeed, they did. They know that handing over the shirt off their back just because you admired it wasn't absolutely necessary. They know they know they had the option not to do it. But they're afraid; afraid that if they DON'T give you the shirt off their backs they'll lose a potential friend. Some incredible voice inside tells them that to show what a nice person they are, they should give that shirt to the other person (and good things will come of it).

Meanwhile, there is a person who praised the shirt, never expecting the wearer to pull it off and hand it to them. But that's what's happening now. Here's a person they don't even know, giving them a gift. Freely, willingly. Underneath there's a small suspicion that the giver is engaging in "give to get" but you ignore that. Get what? Well, you're supposed to like them when you're accepting and wearing that shirt. They never asked for anything more, did they?

My father was a gift-giver. He gave items worth thousands when it came to his girlfriends. And they took them. Sadly, many of them didn't care about the terms of the exchange. He gave, hoping they'd love him forever; they took, knowing they despised the guy. Eventually they told him they had never really liked him and he should go to hell.

I never heard that any of them gave back the eight thousand dollar sewing machine or the ten thousand dollar antique Turkish carpet.

So now we come to the question.

On the one hand, we have the givers. On the other hand, the takers.

Sure, the givers are making a choice. For some it's even a compulsion, but still they're making a choice. Sometimes it's compelled: "You won't go anywhere at this job unless you put in the extra hours, because we can always find someone who will."

Don't forget, the takers are making a choice, too. They're choosing to accept what's freely offered to them, or what might be offered under compulsion.

My question is, does taking and taking and taking what is usually freely offered, or taking what was coerced by more powerful people or people perceived as more powerful, confer any obligation on the taker? Like maybe ... appreciation, in whatever degree or form you're capable of?

Or is it just fine to say, "Hell, it was your choice, I don't owe you squat"?

I've known people who were capable of taking and taking and taking like this, and even encouraged the giver to commit to more and more work, time, money, whatever, and then smirked and told the giver to get lost. How is this right?